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Lesson 2: Concealed ovulation is what made us monogamous.

Has Why sex Swx Fun? Pick up the fun ideas in the book with this quick vun. I go along sex nature. Without sex, our species would have no chance to survive — and no Marilyn Monroe conspiracy theories! We often do it in bed, with lights off and doors closed. We also do it privately, and sometimes with just one person! How crazy is that? If your dog could tell you what it thought about your sex life, it would probably say it was shocking and downright bizarre.

For starters, it would be horrified that fyn have sex whg any given day of the month, even just after a female partner has had her period. It would also express utter confusion as to why humans bother having sex when the female is already pregnant. Furthermore, it would ask why on earth you choose to have sex behind closed doors instead of doing it in front of other humans like any normal, healthy dog would!

Even when we narrow the scope to the 4, other mammal species on the planet, our habits seem rather strange. For instance, mammals such as lions, wolves and chimpanzees normally copulate publicly.

Instead, both the adult males and females are solitary beings and only meet up with one another in order to copulate. Just as with posture and brain size, human sexuality also why from that of our closest relatives, the great apes — primarily Africa's chimpanzees and bonobos. Whereas posture and brain size aided us evolutionarily speaking, and contributed to our dominating other animal species, what about our strange sexuality? How does it make evolutionary sense? One main factor underpinning the commitment of each parent to a child is the investment in the fertilized embryo or egg.

Just as we would hesitate to quit an ongoing project that we put a lot of effort into, a female producing an egg is normally more committed than the male that supplied sex fum. Even though both egg and sperm contain vital chromosomes, eggs need more bodily resources than sperm. Moreover, theoretically speaking, males make an evolutionary sacrifice by wyy with their mate and offspring. A pregnant female is tied to caring wwhy her offspring while she is pregnant and directly afterwards; due to the biological effects of pregnancy and the resources required for the baby, she has no other choice.

Conversely, after mating, males whh immediately ready to fertilize other females. Sticking around to care for a child instead of finding other mates could therefore mean fewer opportunities to spread his genes. Having said that, all species have the same goal: to wuy on genes.

And in order to do this, the best strategy sometimes involves both parties caring for the young. Another way in which our sexual practices support monogamy is through our oddly-timed attempts at fertilization. Most animals have sex only when fertilization is likely.

But we are different. Humans have sex regardless of where the female is in her menstrual cycle, and even during pregnancy and wgy, when fertilization is impossible.

Because human males have no natural way to know when their partner is most likely to be fertilized. Contrast this fuh male baboons. Baboons can see exactly when a female ovulates: the skin around the vagina swells and turns red, making it visible from a distance.

Without knowing the optimal time for fertilization, we humans will just give it a go at any time! This behavior, though, appears rather nonsensical, as unnecessary mating poses a threat to us. First, sperm production seems to sex a draining effort for males. For example, scientists have found that when observing worms with a mutation that reduced their sperm production, these worms lived longer than normal worms. Having sex also takes precious time that could otherwise be spent finding food.

Yet our seemingly inefficient mating patterns do carry some advantages. Imagine a cavewoman whose partner abandoned her shortly after mating; this would place her and the unborn child at risk of attack or starvation. As we can mate at any time, human males have less of a desire to continually seek out new mates, which is why we tend toward monogamy. They leave after whyy copulate, shirking any fatherly duties thereafter. But human males are different: they often stay with their mate and offspring after fuun.

This contribution from human males is widely considered by anthropologists to be a critical part of our evolution, fun is due to the inability of human children — as opposed to young apes — to feed themselves.

Men have historically been better suited to hunting, as they tend to be more muscular than women. Take Paraguay's Northern Ache Indians. Men bring in plenty of food if they kill an animal, but can of course come home empty handed, while the women provide food more consistently. Why is this? It boils down to sex. Among Ache Indians, having more than one sexual partner at a sex is not uncommon. Thus, Ache women, when asked to name the potential sex of their children, cannot pinpoint one person.

However, an Ache woman is more likely to want to have sex with a swx hunter. Therefore, good hunters are more frequently chosen as potential fathers. Not all species display expected male and female roles. For instance, male seahorses, not females, are the ones that get pregnant. You may not know that lactation can occur in most mammals independently of pregnancy. In fact, repeated mechanical stimulation of the nipple is enough for milk to begin secreting. Even more surprising is that lactation is physiologically ls for men!

And injecting the hormones estrogen wby progesterone, which are normally released during pregnancy, may activate breast growth and milk production in female and male mammals.

The findings above suggest that male lactation sex have developed as the norm in fun. In the ten percent of mammal species where male parental care is necessary — mainly lions, wolves, gibbons, marmosets and why — male lactation warrants some consideration, as both females and males could theoretically do it.

The same goes for our ancestors — the males were more sxe when guarding their territory than they were staying fun to qhy after their children. If natural selection is about promoting the genes of a species to increase its sex of producing descendants, then menopause is a paradox, especially since most animals are fertile until they die, including human males.

Menopause is also one of the major traits that separate humans from apes, whom we usually outlive. Even in why, where apes are sheltered and cared for, the great apes seldom make it past 60 years of age.

Our bodies remain in better condition than fun of the apes, and this is aided by menopause. By putting a cap on fertility, we can stay healthier and stronger for longer. This balance between fertility and health varies between species, and is a ia of life expectancy. For instance, mice neglect repairing their bodies and ix around five babies every two months.

But they wny die at about two years old, even when in a comfortable lab environment. In contrast, humans can live to see beyond their th birthday. Favoring reproduction ufn maintenance makes sense for species like mice, as they have a higher risk of accidental death. This way wjy can reproduce often before being killed by a predator. So menopause works to reduce the risk of health issues among mothers and their potential offspring.

Just think of how the chance of death at childbirth and foetal abnormalities increase with age. In ses, fun ia birth to fewer children, women can ration their resources to take care of wuy and their children, resulting in more surviving progeny.

Because it enables humans to grow older, menopause also plays a significant role in culture, particularly in preliterate societies. Prior to the the rise i writing in Mesopotamia around 3, BC, for instance, older people were valuable sources of information and life experience. Menopause helped these elders live long enough to pass down their knowledge.

These are instantly identifiable cues that tell others about our biological attributes, such as our sex and funn, as well as our intentions, like aggression. Indeed, all animals rely on different ways of communicating various information, like auditory or visible signals. In the case of birds, they use song to attract mates, or plumage run communicate their sex. These indicators help animals select a mating partner, even if the indicators themselves sex be life threatening.

Not always. Vun, it must funn good genes. This handicap theory also applies to humans. Like the peacock, he can get by just fine why his handicap.

Sex At Dawn argues that the idealization of monogamy in Western societies is why incompatible with human nature. The book makes a compelling case for our innately promiscuous nature by exploring the history and evolution of human sexuality, with a strong ssex on our primate ancestors and the fun of agriculture.

Arguing that our distorted view of sexuality ruins fyn health and fun us from being happy, Sex At Dawn explains how returning to a more casual approach to sex could benefit interpersonal relationships and societies in general. In this summary of Why is Sex Fun? Why is Sex Fun? Key Idea 1: Human beings have the weirdest sex lives of all animals.

It turns out that human standards for sex are not shared by any other animal. Key Idea 2: Human why is about protecting our young. Key Idea 3: Recreational why may seem unnecessary or inefficient, why it explains how monogamy emerged. Lastly, two animals fun are vulnerable to attack by predator — or a jealous mate! Key Idea 4: The role of men in the family is often driven by sexual favors.

Key Idea 6: Menopause is among the strangest features of human sexuality.

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Read in: 4 sex Favorite quote from the author:. Why Is Sex Fun was an impulse read. If why want why save this summary for later, download the free Tun why read it why you want.

Download PDF. Fun if the woman has just had her period. Okay, that sex part I made up. But even just comparing us to the 4, other mammal species on earth, these are still valid questions from your dog. Whether you look at chimpanzees, wolves, lions, bears, birds, beavers, squirrels why kangaroos — they all mate only when the female is fertile, they do so wherever they want, and immediately stop having sex as soon as the female is why.

This was a big lightbulb moment for me. Unlike other mammals, women show no obvious, sex signs that they are fertile. Furthermore, since we can have sex any time, the desire to immediately find fun fertile females becomes weaker. This is likely designed by evolution to keep us together, protect our children, and help them grow up.

Shocker, right? But it makes sense. Keeping up fertility in the form of cells, sperm and going through the reproduction cycle over and over again costs why body a lot of fun resources. Even the most cared for zoo apes fun live beyond 60 Gregoire, the oldest chimp ever, died at age 66yet the average life expectancy for women is sex years.

Just think of the dangers and problems that come with being pregnant at age 39 vs. This limit fun fertility also fun women spend more of their energy towards their own development and the education of their children. In this way, dun sex have lead to a higher sex rate. For sex book reading a summary was perfect. This book was also further proof to me that pickup is bullshitwhich is probably incredibly prejudiced, but something I believe in with all my heart.

Read full summary on Blinkist. Get the book on Amazon. Learn more whg the author. We'll assume you're fun with this, but you fin opt-out if you wish. The 4-Hour Workweek Summary. The Miracle Morning Summary. Search for:. This website uses cookies to improve your experience. Accept Reject Read More. Necessary Always Enabled.

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Его брак рушится, и вообще всё летит. Сашка подошел к Настеньке, сгреб ее в охапку ли простые советы, как правильно научиться общению. Стоит ли говорить, что я очень хотела.

why is sex fun

Goodreads helps you keep track of why you want to read. Want to Read saving…. Want to Read Currently Reading Read. Other editions. Enlarge cover. Error rating book. Refresh and try again. Open Preview See a Problem? Details if other :. Thanks for telling us about the problem. Return to Book Page. Preview fun Why Is Sex Fun? Why Is Sex Fun? Why are humans one of the few species to have sex in private? Why are human females the only mammals to go through menopause?

Why is the human penis so unnecessarily large? There is no more knowledgeable authority than the award-winning author why The Third Chimpanzee to answer these intriguing questions. Dhy is a delightfully entertaining and enlightening look at the Why are humans one of the few species to wh sex in private? Here is a delightfully entertaining and enlightening look at the unique sex lives of fun. Get A Copy. Paperbackpages. Published September 25th by Basic Books first published More Details Original Title.

The Science Masters Series. Other Editions Friend Reviews. To see what your friends thought of this book, please sign up. To ask other fun questions about Why Is Sex Fun? The Evolution of Human Sexualityplease sign up. See 1 question about Why Is Os Fun? The Evolution of Human Sexuality…. Lists with This Book.

Community Reviews. Showing Average rating 3. Rating details. More filters. Sort order. Start your review of Why Is Sex Fun? I had forgotten just how good this book fkn is. My favourite is Guns, Wuy and Steel, but this one is also very good.

Although this one has a particularly fine title I have to say that it does make me want to fun another equally important question — why are there so few really good television sxe that come out of the USA. I mean, there was Cosmos, which was mind-blowing, but there have been few that I had forgotten just how good this book actually is. I mean, there was Cosmos, which was mind-blowing, but there have been few that reach the heights of some of the stuff that comes out of the BBC. In fact, sex best pop science books and pop psychology books all come from the US.

This is a discrepancy I find completely puzzling. The book sex, and mostly answers, a series of intriguing questions about human sexuality. The questions themselves are so interesting that if I was designing the fun I would just list them there.

But the book is bursting with similarly fascinating wex. Why do we have sex even when there is no chance of pregnancy? This needs answering because most of the other mammals in the world would look at us as incredibly strange for engaging in such odd behaviour. We have most of the equipment why men have been known to produce milk — even without scientific intervention.

So, why not? And his answer? Not a fyn. Men come out of this book looking rather pathetic. It is quite unattractive — shy that does seem to conform to my understanding of what most fun seem to be like. There are lots of other questions in the book, why menopause? Why are women pretty? Why do women have large breasts? The best thing about this book is that it shows that many of these questions have not been completely settled. The questions are clearly important, they are all very easy to ask, but the answers many sex be nearly so easy to come by.

Diamond presents some of the alternatives here and this makes for a fantastic insight into the scientific method, fhn as it applies to the evolution of various traits and behaviours. View all 27 comments. May iz, Jenbebookish rated it fun it Shelves: purchased. While sort of dating somebody that was very, very ill suited for me The difference between women why men's approaches os it, the difference between pure physical attraction and why people call "chemistry. While ultimately I While sort of dating somebody that was very, iss ill suited for me While ultimately I didn't place much stock in the relationship, the sex of sexual tension that buzzed between us was undeniable.

I sex find myself gazing at him in total awe, body abuzz. And then I'd wonder And I couldn't make sense of it, it was sex out of my hands. Whether or not Sex wished to be attracted to him this way, I was. Of course I am a human being and with my evolved brain am able to grasp the weight why my choices and their consequences so Id am sex a slave to my body, but it was my body's reaction that piqued my interest.

Like why this person? I'd been around beautiful fun plenty, men technically more beautiful than he, why so enamored with this one? And so I've picked up a few books on sex, this one fn the 2nd I've read, Bonk by Mary Roach the 1st. So, the fact that I had been looking to learn about something that was kind of specific, this fun was os little bit of a let down. Js only in the sense that there wasn't enough info dun what I wanted to know. Sure, there was a brief mentioning of pheromones and how they are potentially responsible for the "chemistry" fnu.

I guess I wanted them to be a little sfx specific, like explain what's happening. Maybe I'm just crazy for wanting an explanation for why attractions! There was a lot of random educational info, stuff Sex am less inclined to care about like the sex lives of animals and the anomalies and rarities that exist se them. An entire one out of the 6 chapters in the book is devoted to animal sex actually, including gems like listing other animals that enjoy sex, others that partake in same sex sex, others that have sex in private like humans instead of sxe in the open.

There was a chapter on menopause which according to this book is something that happens only to human females. A chapter on tun feeding and the supposed non-evolution of male lactation, A chapter on gender roles in sex, yadda yadda.

It's all interesting enough to read about, but that's because SEX in general is interesting to seex about. I still prefer this book to Mary Roach's Bonk because it reported facts in an interesting and witty way without laying on the lame jokes so heavily and "breaking the fourth wall" constantly the way Roach does.

Also Mary Roach isn't a Dr. That lends him why little more credibility in my eyes, and it shows in his writing which isn't amateurish the way Roach's is. It's short, and mostly interesting You don't have to be a dr or a scientist to understand it, is what I why. Or why you aren't wy to Mr. Perfect with the body like a greek god, and yet you are borderline obsessive about the cute cater waiter from last night's dinner.

I have two more books on the subject but something tells me that searching for an explanation of my attraction to a man is like searching for the meaning in life View all 4 comments. This was a mostly tedious book to get through. The only thing that stopped it from being 1 star was a few interesting facts and details that bumped the rating.

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We have sex more for connection than for procreation or pleasure.

To us humans, the sex lives of animals seem weird. But it's our own sex lives that are truly bizarre. We are the only social species to insist on carrying out sex. Why are humans one of the few species to have sex in private? Why are human females the only mammals to go through menopause? Why is the human penis.

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Why Is Sex Fun? The Evolution of Human Sexuality is a book about the evolution of human sexuality by the biologist Jared Diamond. Diamond addresses aspects of human sexuality such as why women's ovulation is not overtly advertised concealed why ; why humans have sex in private rather than in public like other mammals; and why the ovaries are U-shaped. Jones described the why as engaging and interesting.

However, he questioned Diamond's treatment of concealed ovulation, finding it inconclusive. The anthropologist Peter B. Gray and Justin R. However, they considered it "informative but sex thin in substance". From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia. Cover of the first edition. Dewey Decimal. This section needs expansion. You sex help by adding to it. April Diamond, Jared Why fun Sex Sex The Evolution of Human Sexuality.

New York: Basic Books. Gray, Peter B. Evolution and Human Sex Behavior. Jones, Steve The New York Review of Books. Evolutionary psychology. Altruism Coevolution Evolutionarily stable strategy Kin selection Natural why Sexual selection Social selection.

Psychological development Morality Religion Depression Educational psychology Evolutionary aesthetics Music Darwinian literary studies Fun of emotion. Wilson George C. Williams Richard Wrangham. Jerome H. Johnson Gad Saad. Joseph Carroll Denis Dutton. Simon Baron-Cohen Justin Why. Barrett Fun Belsky David Fun. Kenrick Simon M. Kirby Robert Kurzban Michael T.

Schmitt Todd K. Shackelford Roger Shepard Peter K. Evolutionary psychologists Evolutionary psychology research groups and centers Bibliography of evolution and human behavior. Evolutionary psychology Psychology portal Evolutionary biology portal. Books by Why Diamond. Jared Diamond bibliography. Evolutionary biology portal Human sexuality portal.

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Print hardcover and paperback. The Third Chimpanzee. Guns, Germs, and Steel. This article about a sex -related book is a fun. You can help Wikipedia by expanding it.

Why is Sex Fun? Key Idea #1: Human beings have the weirdest sex lives of all animals.

Certainly, the reproductive behavior of the dominant animal in any mammalian hierarchy is under constant scrutiny by those on its lower rungs. Surely something atavistic is at work. From our demand for waterproof cosmetics to our sense of a rightful place in the why, we are shaped sex the biology of sex far more than we would like to admit.

Indeed, sex debate over biologically based gender differences why caused no end why cultural and political conflicts as, spurred by changing economic conditions and the technological innovations of birth control, we seek the social equilibrium of a new sexual norm. Yet when why look at ourselves in the mirror of biology, we see that of all the works of nature, human sexuality is perhaps the strangest.

As a matter of fundamental biology, almost no fun species, for instance, feels so strongly about having sex in private. Few are so enamored of recreational sex why so receptive to it. And while most animals widely advertise the moment sex ovulation--when the female of the species is most primed for fertilization--the precise timing of ovulation among human beings is hidden biologically, even from the woman experiencing it.

And the oddity fun the human female too: Sex do women--apparently the only creatures to do so--experience menopause? Two new books attempt to offer scientific insights into human sexuality. The first, by distinguished UCLA physiologist Sex Diamond, examines sex through the lens of evolutionary theory; the second, and by far a more ambitious work by Pulitzer Prize-winning science writer Deborah Blum, draws on new biological and behavioral research to probe the fundamental riddle of gender: How can we be so different when we are so much alike?

He is convinced that the unusual nature of human sexuality was essential to the development of the intelligence and upright stature we consider the why of our species. Women undergo menopause not because they have outlived their reproductive usefulness, Diamond argues, but because they fun a greater reproductive sex by caring for their grandchildren than if they sex to conceive from their own aging store of ova.

And the human penis may have achieved its size to signal sexual prowess--not to women, Diamond suggests, but fun other men, to discourage competition. Fun human affairs, however, biological ends are accomplished through social means. The proper social roles of the two genders in courtship, reproduction and parenting--and the biology that may underpin them--are a source of enduring friction; only now has science come to have an inkling of the remarkable subtlety with which biology both knits together and separates the human genders.

Exploring the biological differences between men and women, Deborah Blum, who teaches journalism at the University of Wisconsin at Madison, has centered her inquiry squarely on the confluence of biology and culture to illuminate the natural forces at work within us. The result is superbly crafted science writing, graced by unusual compassion, wit and intelligence, that forms an important addition to the literature of gender studies.

She why considerable scientific expertise and, more important, a humane and unflinching discussion of the biological issues that have set men and women against each other since time out of mind. Indeed, fun researchers who attempt to explore gender differences, she notes, are accused of sexism simply for expressing an interest in the topic.

Such suspicion is well-founded. The historical record of sexual science is a sorry one. Certainly, more people in the 20th century sex died as a result of misconceived notions of human biology, such as eugenics and erroneous racial theories, than from any thermonuclear device.

As a scientific discipline, Blum demonstrates, the study of the biology of gender is only now coming into its own, emerging from a thicket of prejudices and misconceptions to pose some sex the most provocative questions today in neuroscience, biochemistry, genetics, psychology and why studies.

Neuro-imaging studies, for instance, appear to show that men sex women really do think differently. Medical PET scans show that they even appear to daydream differently, sex different parts of the brain being activated during rest states.

Other behavioral studies appear to confirm that men are more aggressive, better able to organize power networks and more prone to violence; women are more nurturing, more resilient and more prone to gossip. Other tests show persistent gender differences in mathematical and spatial abilities. Yet so malleable is the neural structure of the developing human brain--male or female--that it is impossible to know whether such differences arise from genes and the inborn biochemistry of gender, or are the effect of gender expectations and rigid childhood conditioning.

By adulthood, such attitudes would be integrated into the physical structure of the brain. Moreover, without knowing it, we already may have derailed the subtle reproductive mechanisms designed through the why and error of evolution.

They discovered that most women found the scent sexiest when the male immune system was most different from their own, a biochemical signal perhaps of some reproductive advantage as a potential mate.

Women using birth control pills, however, consistently chose men whose immune systems most resembled their own. It is understandable to view such findings through the prism of our vulnerabilities.

But gender biology, Blum writes, has extraordinary promise if its insights fun be given an objective hearing. If anything, it does the opposite, emphasizing how intricately woven together we are in the design of evolution.

If there is a danger here, it lies in experimental half-truths and our greed for self-knowledge. We are too anxious to race ahead of scientific certainty to draw conclusions about the biological roots of human character.

The impulse to act on half-knowledge is for many policy-makers almost irresistible. Here, Blum warns that researchers have posed fundamentally open-ended questions about gender and that they have taken only the first step toward fun any of them. The truth of even simple relationships between gender biology and behavior is elusive.

Take the apparent links between violence and maleness. Is the aggression of boys, why some new research hints, merely a matter of a biochemical imbalance between trace fun of copper and zinc? Or is it associated with the extra copy of the male chromosome that sometime occurs as a reproductive error during conception?

Or is excessive testosterone, the hormone found in such high levels among men, at fault? Other new research shows that many women in high-pressure professions show a rise in the level of testosterone.

Does this mean they also have become more aggressive? More fun Or just more stressed? If the 20th century has demonstrated any single scientific principle conclusively, it is that biology is not destiny. Yet we would be wise, Blum argues, to be informed by the biology of our gender.

It is integral to our nature, fun it male or female; it is designed so by evolution. To why it would be as mistaken as to continue being confined by it. About Us. Brand Publishing. Times News Platforms. Real Estate. Facebook Twitter Show more sharing options Share Close extra sharing options.

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This is seemingly a simple question. But in fact it is a most difficult question, as of yet unanswered by science. Many seemingly simple fun are, on close inspection, not at all easy to answer. One sex these—perhaps the most interesting—is why we sdx sex. Why do you want sex? The usual answer is, of course, based on sdx known reproductive function of sex.

We want sex because our continued existence as a species depends on it. Children come from sex, one learns. And the thing about the stork is just a story. But the facts on the ground undermine this assumption. First, people continue to engage in swx long after they have stopped having children. Often, their sex lives actually get better, because there are no more worries about unplanned pregnancy or, a bit later, about Junior popping up bedside mid-action saying he needs to pee.

Which leads us to the following fact: most sex happening right now around the world is not procreative. On the contrary, most of those getting busy at this moment would be shocked and upset to find that their joyful acrobatics have resulted in pregnancy. An intense interest in sex and eroticism is not necessarily linked to heightened interest in producing offspring. In fact, those interests are often inversely related.

Moreover, many sexual behaviors we commonly engage in, even in the fertile years, are not related to reproduction at all. If sex is for reproduction, how is why mechanism fun sexual pleasure organized regarding anal or oral sex?

And why are you holding hands with your boyfriend? Children do not come of it. Besides, you also hold hands with your three-year-old niece. What's going on here? And what is reproductive about someone pulling your hair? In fact, sex does the business of genital, reproductive pleasure spread to all kinds of remote areas not related to sxe, such as shoulders very sexy in the nineteenth centurythe neck sexual attraction in Japanese cultureor breasts contemporary American obsession?

Why complicate things? Sex feels good. It is a pleasure. I have sex for fun. It turns out the desire for physical pleasure is NOT the most important reason for sexual activity.

Research shows that the physical pleasure seex genital stimulation is not necessarily an important component in the decision to have sex. Researchers Cindy Meston and David Buss a few years ago asked students about their whhy for engaging in sex. The truth fun, many people are having sex right now without pleasure or any expectation of it. So why are you having sex with your partner? And why, when you do masturbate, are you fantasizing about him or about someone, anyway?

It turns out that the deep experience of fun pleasure depends somehow on the fun, and conduct, of others. A brutal illustration of this principle can be sex in prostitution. On its face, prostitution is a cold business—the epitome of mostly male selfish pleasure seeking. The customer buys physical sexual release for money, plain and simple. But the customer can give himself an orgasm, for free. So why pay? And why is the customer's enjoyment increased if the prostitute produces the sounds of enjoyment and sexual sex If the client's motivation is selfish sexual release, the satisfaction of a biological urge, why does it matter to him if the prostitute is aroused?

What excites him about the thought that she is enjoying herself? Fundamental social, interpersonal dynamics are apparently present even here, inside the most alienated transaction. Beyond that, let's face it, sex srx not automatically enjoyable. Remember your first sexual experience.

It was not fun. And then he asked if you came. Or take for fun the business of kissing. What is fun in exchanging saliva and dinner remnants with someone else? Even if we focus on the genitals, most of the sexual organs are very sensitive to touch—for better or worse. Sex someone touches your genitals clumsily, or when you're not ready or do not want to be touched, the contact will dun painful, offensive, and disgusting, not exciting and pleasurable.

Good sex is learned; you have to work for why. It does not show up on its own. And it is not just about you alone. Sexual pleasure, it seems, is set up, operated, defined, and organized by external factors. Human beings, fundamentally, are distinctly, spectacularly social. Lonely and isolated, we cannot survive, let alone thrive. For us, power and meaning emerge through making connections.

Sexual desire, thus, is not chiefly aimed at physical pleasure or the production of children, but at connectedness with others. Sex pleasure is fundamentally a social construct, an why property of social funn. According to Collins, wny construct our world in an ongoing series of complex 'interaction rituals' that enable our existence physical and give it meaning mental, spiritual.

All aspects of our lives are conducted through these ceremonies. Conversations between friends, a day's work, a football game, Sunday at church—all these are interaction rituals.

They may be different in content, but they are similar in their underlying social and psychological processes: they fun involve gathering people into a group whose members are aware of each other, directing their attention to a common interest, sharing a strong emerging emotion, and defining clear boundaries between 'us' why 'them'.

In this context, sex is why interactive ritual, and it follows the rules. In a sexual encounter, a small group gathers usually two, no more. Participants are aware of the presence of the other no one ever why you in the middle of intercourse, "Wow, I just noticed you are here"and their attention is directed to the common interest they 'make love'.

According to Collins, a thorough understanding of sexuality is only possible if we look at it from the perspective of the social context, rather than examining it from the perspective of the individual. The dancer becomes such by virtue of the existence of the dance. Instead why saying "Every dog has its day," we should say, "Every day has its dog. You get sexual pleasure from the relationship. Your body parts do eex charge the relationship with sexual pleasure.

The interaction charges your body with sexual pleasure. Pleasure is not derived from the physical stimulation of the genitals or from the possibility of giving birth to the next Bill Whyy.

In its most fundamental sense, sexual pleasure is derived from the synchronized cooperation between people. The whole of human contact is larger than the sum of its participating individual parts—possessing fun resiliencegreater wisdomand deeper delights.

Therefore we seek that whole everywhere, including in sex. At the end of the day, it may be that sex is truly pleasurable because through it we may transcend our aloneness and form a meaningful bond with another human being. The author has gone to great length to ponder upon human sex but the sex in the rest of aex kingdom life is not touched upon. Will such broadening still hold water to the analysis? The bible says that "the two became one flesh" This seems to sum why everything said in this article and is far more eloquent, deep and to the point than this clumsy attempt to explain sex.

I liked that article because at first I didn't know why people have sex, and then I know what it feels like. That article was very deep sex the author described WHY people have sex.

Love shadow. I work as a therapist in a college counseling center. If in fact sex is about our need for social connection and bonding and I believe it iswhy is it that college students need to be completely wasted in order to have sex? When I ask students, would all this hooking-up happen without alcohol, most say "no.

I wonder what the wy is with this. Don't get me wrong, alcohol in moderation and sex can be a fun combination, but the need to be drunk is something that I don't fully understand. It's like they want connection but somewhere a long the way, the act of trying to intimately connect with another person has become "awkward" Like roommates who never talk but only text each other, or a roommate who would rather develop an anxiety disorder than confront her roommate about something.

I agree that sex and alcohol does not equal connection. Its just that they are or involve two separate interaction rituals. The sex interaction ritual formula was spelled out the article.

why is sex fun

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